"NO! Participles, why must you dangle so! I am undone by the lax writing environment I hoped to create!"

To better understand the nature of my character, you must understand that I find this comic to be uproarious. While I only wish the utterances I pontificate were as evocative as this literary pearl; I cannot constrain my uninhibited critic of the selection of the word "create" from the vast lexicon English provides. Irrefutably "engenders" is a lexeme of superior distinction then the authors selection.

Ha!